Why does my boyfriend get mad when I tell him how I feel?

So the real REASON why men get so defensive, when you tell them how you feel, is because they THINK you are attacking them! In their minds, that's what's happening. Even if you're NOT. That is why they react so strongly and defensively.
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Why does he get defensive when I express my feelings?

He has a problem with communication

Communication is the key to solving a situation such as this; bad communication could cause your partner's defensive behavior, he may feel like he needs to talk and clear the air because of how things are being presented.
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Why does my boyfriend get defensive when I ask questions?

He is defensive because he is defensive. You two have to be able to discuss unpleasant subjects or your relationship won't get very far. You need to evaluate how you are approaching him with issues, and he needs to man up and be able to take criticism without going inside his shell and blaming you for making him do it.
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Why can't I tell my boyfriend how I feel?

There can be several reasons why your partner isn't comfortable talking about their feelings, according to Dr. Brown. "[It could be that] they don't feel safe, in general, opening up. They have been hurt, betrayed, or shamed when they have opened up in the past.
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What does it mean when your BF gets mad easily?

There could be trust issues in the relationship, or he might feel overworked. Whatever it is, an issue such as this could be causing him to feel anger and resentment towards you, which might present itself as anger for everything that you do.
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How To Make A Man OBSESSED Over You!! (3 WAYS)



What is a toxic relationship?

A toxic relationship is one that makes you feel unsupported, misunderstood, demeaned, or attacked. On a basic level, any relationship that makes you feel worse rather than better can become toxic over time. Toxic relationships can exist in just about any context, from the playground to the boardroom to the bedroom.
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How do I calm my angry boyfriend?

7 ways to calm down a man when he is angry and defensive
  1. 01/8​7 ways to calm down a man when he is angry and defensive. ...
  2. 02/8​Treat his anger as a call for help. ...
  3. 03/8​Try to remain calm. ...
  4. 04/8​Make him feel emotionally safe. ...
  5. 05/8​Practice compassion. ...
  6. 06/8​Never assume. ...
  7. 07/8​Listen to him actively. ...
  8. 08/8​Spot the anger early.
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Why do guys avoid talking about their feelings?

The first reason is simple: men often aren't encouraged to talk about their feelings. In fact, they're sometimes discouraged from doing so. Additionally, men often tend to shy away from vulnerable conversations. “It's a little social, but it's also a little biological,” Vossenkemper explains.
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What is emotional invalidation?

By definition, invalidation is the process of denying, rejecting or dismissing someone's feelings. Invalidation sends the message that a person's subjective emotional experience is inaccurate, insignificant, and/or unacceptable.
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Why is it hard for me to communicate with my boyfriend?

Lack of awareness

Oftentimes we don't really even know how we are feeling and what we are needing in our relationships. It's so much easier to focus on our partner's behavior and point the finger at them than it is to look inward and really pay attention to our own feelings and needs.
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Why does my husband get defensive when I tell him how I feel?

So the real REASON why men get so defensive, when you tell them how you feel, is because they THINK you are attacking them! In their minds, that's what's happening. Even if you're NOT. That is why they react so strongly and defensively.
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What is defensiveness in a relationship?

When you become defensive in a conversation with your partner, you react to their words without listening to what they're saying. More often than not, you attempt to ward off the perceived attack by turning the tables on them. “It's not my fault that we're always late; it's your fault.”
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What does it mean when a man gets defensive?

If you are feeling guilty about something and someone else brings up a related topic, then you might respond in a defensive manner. A reaction to hiding the truth. You may become defensive if you are trying to hide the truth about something or lying. A reaction to attacks on your character or behavior.
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What are the signs of emotional immaturity?

What Are the Signs of Emotional Immaturity?
  • Blaming others when things go wrong.
  • Lying to get out of uncomfortable situations or conversations.
  • Name-calling during conflicts.
  • Inability to control one's impulses, such as engaging in reckless behaviors.
  • Needing to be the center of attention at all times.
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How do I talk to my partner who is defensive?

When communicating your feelings:
  1. Stick to the facts. ...
  2. Use “I” statements. ...
  3. Do not mirror the defensive person's anger. ...
  4. Raise your hand up towards the other person with an open palm, to signal stop. ...
  5. Repeat yourself. ...
  6. Physically remove yourself.
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When someone won't acknowledge your feelings?

Emotional invalidation often happens when you're expressing your feelings or talking about an experience. People often invalidate someone because they're unable to process that person's emotions. They might be preoccupied with their own problems or not know how to respond in the moment.
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How do I get my partner to understand how I feel?

15 Little Ways To Get Your Partner To Better Understand You...
  1. Use As Many "I" Statements As Possible. ...
  2. Keep It Short And Sweet. ...
  3. Focus On Understanding Them. ...
  4. Keep Your Voice Calm. ...
  5. Pay Attention To Your Body Language. ...
  6. Make Emotions Part Of Your Daily Convo. ...
  7. Be Clearer About How You Feel.
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When your partner hurt your feelings?

Try explaining the exact words they used that hurt you, but express your hurt feelings calmly rather than with anger. It's totally OK to be angry, but when communicating with your partner, it might be easier to get your message across if you can avoid lashing out at them.
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How do you validate a man's feelings?

To validate someone's feelings is first to be open and curious about someone's feelings. Next, it is to understand them, and finally it is to nurture them. Validation doesn't mean that you have to agree with or that the other person's experience has to make sense to you.
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How does a man show his love without saying it?

He wants to be close to you.

He'll make an effort to be physically close to you as much as possible. He'll have his hand around your shoulder and he'll sneak peeks at you from across the room when you're out with friends, that shows how happy he is that you're his.
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Why is it so hard for my boyfriend to express his feelings?

One reason your boyfriend may have difficulty expressing his feelings is poor communication skills. In other words, he simply may not know how to talk about his experiences and emotions. He may lack effective communication skills if he came from a family that did not talk about their feelings or problems.
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How does a man show his vulnerability?

He can't wait to show you off to his friends and family. He is open and shares his “authentic” self with you, expressing his emotions and vulnerable side. He is there when you need him because he is genuinely concerned for your welfare. He treats you truly special and as a priority in his life.
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How make him crazy for you?

24 Ways to Make Him Crazy About You
  1. Show off your natural beauty. Makeup highlights your beautiful features, but don't underestimate how much men love the natural look. ...
  2. Make him work for it. ...
  3. Be yourself. ...
  4. Don't always be the first to call. ...
  5. Be kind to his friends. ...
  6. Don't be jealous. ...
  7. Make him laugh. ...
  8. Keep living your life.
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How can I be a good girlfriend?

Here are 30 ways to be the best girlfriend to your boyfriend and enjoy a stronger, happier, and lasting relationship with him.
  1. Trust him. ...
  2. Encourage him. ...
  3. Be honest. ...
  4. Respect his time with friends. ...
  5. Don't flirt with other men. ...
  6. Appreciate his little efforts. ...
  7. Don't take him for granted. ...
  8. Send him sweet messages.
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How do you text your boyfriend when he is mad at you?

If you want to make a guy that is mad at you like you again through text, start by apologizing, and being specific about what you're sorry for. For example, start off with "I'm sorry I was late to our meeting.” Then, take responsibility for how your actions affected him and assure him that it won't happen again.
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