Why do people with BPD say such hurtful things?

They may say things that are cruel, unfair, or irrational. Their fear of abandonment can cause them to overreact to any perceived slight, no matter how small, and their aggression can result in impulsive fits of rage, verbal abuse, or even violence.
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Does BPD make you say things you dont mean?

People with BPD splitting may say things like:

"I hate you" or other hurtful things they usually don't mean and may feel shame for later. "I never do anything right" and other derogatory all or nothing thinking statements, often as a result of making a mistake.
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What do people with BPD tend to do?

People with BPD have an intense fear of abandonment and have trouble regulating their emotions, especially anger. They also tend to show impulsive and dangerous behaviors, such as reckless driving and threatening self-harm. All of these behaviors make it difficult for them to maintain relationships.
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How do people with BPD react?

In addition to vulnerability to impulsive aggression, people with borderline personality disorder are unusually emotionally reactive. They may be content for a while, then become intensely angry or hopelessly depressed or unbearably anxious—each state, although intense, lasting only a few hours or a day.
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Are borderlines aware of their behavior?

People with borderline personality disorders are aware of their behaviors and the consequences of them and often act in increasingly erratic ways as a self-fulfilling prophecy to their abandonment fears.
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Why do borderlines say hurtful things? Borderline personality disorder



Are borderlines psychopaths?

BPD features are highly represented in subjects with psychopathy as well as psychopathic traits are highly prevalent in patients with BPD.
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How do borderlines destroy lives?

BPD splitting destroys relationships by causing the person to distort how they see themselves and others. BPD relationships shift between highs and lows. BPD splitting destroy relationships in the way that the person defends against bad feelings within themselves so that they can feel good about themselves.
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Do borderlines regret the loss of a quality partner?

People with BPD may be sensitive to rejection and abandonment and are prone to splitting, rage, and impulsivity. If a person with BPD feels rejected or abandoned, they may end the relationship. However, this is usually followed by significant anxiety and regret and efforts to get back together.
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How does a borderline react to no contact?

Along with high emotions - the borderline partner's fear of abandonment may be triggered and they may try harder to hold onto the relationship - or possibly they won't be able to cope and will seek retribution.
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How do you respond to BPD outburst?

How to Help
  1. Be patient.
  2. Be realistic.
  3. Try to separate facts from feelings.
  4. Validate feelings first.
  5. Listen actively and be sympathetic.
  6. Seek to distract when emotions rise.
  7. Do not allow yourself to be the product of the intense anger; attempt to diffuse it but sometimes you may have to walk away.
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What is the most painful mental illness to live with?

Borderline personality disorder (BPD) has long been believed to be a disorder that produces the most intense emotional pain and distress in those who have this condition. Studies have shown that borderline patients experience chronic and significant emotional suffering and mental agony.
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What is the hardest mental illness to have?

BPD in particular is one of the lesser-known mental illnesses, but all the same it is one of the hardest to reckon with. (Some people dislike the term so much they prefer to refer to emotionally unstable personality disorder.)
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How do you know if your borderline is lying?

Here are a few of the issues at the root of lying in BPD.
  1. Intense Emotions. People with BPD experience intense emotions that they can't regulate; this often distorts their perceptions. ...
  2. Impulsivity. ...
  3. Shame. ...
  4. Distorted Self-Perceptions. ...
  5. Rejection Sensitivity. ...
  6. Romantic Relationships.
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What triggers a borderline episode?

Separations, disagreements, and rejections—real or perceived—are the most common triggers for symptoms. A person with BPD is highly sensitive to abandonment and being alone, which brings about intense feelings of anger, fear, suicidal thoughts and self-harm, and very impulsive decisions.
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What triggers splitting in BPD?

A split might often be caused by an event that triggers the extreme binary emotions that characterise BPD. Sometimes, these events might seem harmless or small to people without BPD, but they may in some way relate to previous trauma. This event might spark fears of abandonment, separation or severe anxiety.
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Do borderlines cry a lot?

Compared to non-patients, BPD patients showed the anticipated higher crying frequency despite a similar crying proneness and ways of dealing with tears. They also reported less awareness of the influence of crying on others.
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Can you trust someone with BPD?

People who suffer from BPD show erratic mood-swings and find it difficult to trust and understand the motives of others. As a result, they suffer from fraught personal relationships with friends, colleagues and partners.
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Do borderlines feel remorse?

Often it seems as though there is no remorse or regret when someone with borderline intentionally, or unintentionally, hurt someone they love. They say cruel things, act in cruel ways, and can cause real harm to themselves or to others. When called on it, they will act with little remorse or regret.
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Should you leave someone with BPD?

Enable the person with BPD by protecting them from the consequences of their actions. If your loved one won't respect your boundaries and continues to make you feel unsafe, then you may need to leave. It doesn't mean you don't love them, but your self-care should always take priority.
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Do borderlines ever forgive?

For example, recovered patients with BPD had scores over time that were around three times higher than those of non-recovered patients with BPD for accepting of the past (2.82), been able to forgive others (3.04), and been able to forgive myself (3.01).
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What type of person is attracted to a borderline?

Borderline/dependent: A person with borderline personality disorder (BPD) is well-matched with a person who has a dependent personality disorder (DPD). The BPD has an intense fear of abandonment which is a good match for the DPD who will not leave even a dysfunctional relationship.
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Why do BPD go silent?

While there are no specific causes that would result in quiet BPD vs. typical BPD, it's likely that one's personality or temperament influences how the disorder manifests in terms of outward symptoms or inward symptoms.
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Why do BPD have no friends?

People with BPD enter into emotional interactions in a very consuming way. This is less acceptable in friendships than it is in intimate relationships. It becomes too much in an intimate relationship as well.
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What personality type blames others?

People with narcissistic personality disorder are extremely resistant to changing their behavior, even when it's causing them problems. Their tendency is to turn the blame on to others.
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Do borderlines have narcissistic traits?

Nearly 40% of those with borderline personality disorder also have narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). A person can have one disorder and traits of the other as well. It helps to understand their similarities and differences.
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