Why borderlines are so mean?

One relatively neglected explanation for the overblown rage so common in borderline personality disorders (BPD) relates to their unresolved trust issues. More often than not they were taught, however unintentionally, by their parents' unreliability, neglect, and criticism, not to trust them.
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Why is BPD so mean?

Rage in a person with BPD can occur suddenly and unpredictably, often triggered by an intense fear of being alone. Fear of rejection can be so intense that they begin to anxiously expect rejection. Subtle cues that they associate with rejection can set off unexpectedly intense reactions.
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Can people with BPD be cruel?

Those diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) or those with BPD who may not even know they have it, are more likely than the general population to be verbally, emotionally/psychologically, physically abusive.
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Do borderlines know they hurt you?

Often, the borderline person is unaware of how they feel when their feelings surface, so they displace their feelings onto others as causing them. They may not realise that their feelings belong within them, so they think that their partner is responsible for hurting them and causing them to feel this way.
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Are people with BPD abusive?

People with BPD can be verbally abusive and manipulative, leaving you constantly walking on eggshells to avoid conflict. Don't let your partner's illness consume you. The only way to cope with the stress of living with a BPD partner is to take care of yourself emotionally and physically.
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What a Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) Episode Looks Like



What serial killers had BPD?

Borderline personality disorder
  • Aileen Wuornos, the woman who inspired the 2003 film “Monster” starring Charlize Theron, confessed to seven murders in Florida. ...
  • Jeffrey Dahmer, also known as the “Milwaukee Cannibal,” killed seventeen boys and men between 1978 and 1991. ...
  • Kristen H.
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Are borderlines psychopaths?

BPD features are highly represented in subjects with psychopathy as well as psychopathic traits are highly prevalent in patients with BPD.
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Do borderlines lie a lot?

“People with BPD lie often, but it is not because they are pathological liars,” says Nikki Instone, Ph. D. “Lying is not a symptom of the disorder so much as a consequence of their internal battle.” Lying is really rooted in emotional dysregulation, which is one of the main symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder.
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Do people with BPD punish you?

Punishment and revenge are central to the manifestation of what Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is and means when it comes to relationships. The struggle of those with BPD relationally, is rooted in a proverbial no-win situation.
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Do borderlines lie more?

People with BPD fear abandonment and have trouble maintaining relationships. Nevertheless, they tend to lie, which ruins trust and intimacy, fosters resentment, and harms the very relationships they fear losing. Many family members and friends of those with BPD cite lying as a major problem in their relationships.
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Are borderlines sadistic?

Borderlines often go crazier if you push them to look at their own sadistic tendencies. A classic example is a marriage fight I've seen hundreds of times—a normal neurotic husband forgets the couple's anniversary (or is late to the restaurant, or tells his friends that his wife had breast surgery, or…).
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Do borderlines ever forgive?

These results suggest that patients with BPD report becoming more accepting and forgiving over time. Additionally, recovery status is significantly associated with increasing time in these states.
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What is the most painful mental illness?

Borderline personality disorder (BPD) has long been believed to be a disorder that produces the most intense emotional pain and distress in those who have this condition. Studies have shown that borderline patients experience chronic and significant emotional suffering and mental agony.
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Do borderlines lack empathy?

People with BPD score low on cognitive empathy but high on emotional empathy. This suggests that they do not easily understand other peoples' perspectives, but their own emotions are very sensitive. This is important because it could align BPD with other neurodiverse conditions.
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What is a BPD Favourite person?

A favorite person is the center of attention of an individual living with BPD. This means they consider this person as a trusted friend, confidant, and counselor all wrapped in one. Dr. Roberts notes that the person with BPD demonstrates an “anxious-preoccupied attachment style.”
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How do you calm down a BPD rage?

Here are some tips on healthy ways to manage your anger with BPD.
  1. Count to 10. Hero Images / Getty Images. ...
  2. Notice Your Anger Earlier. Hero Images / Getty Images. ...
  3. Take a Break. Betsie Van Der Meer / Getty Images. ...
  4. Distract Yourself. ...
  5. Take Deep Breaths. ...
  6. Ground Yourself. ...
  7. Listen to Calming Music. ...
  8. Practice Letting Go.
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How do BPD react to being ignored?

A person with BPD is highly sensitive to abandonment and being alone, which brings about intense feelings of anger, fear, suicidal thoughts and self-harm, and very impulsive decisions. When something happens in a relationship that makes them feel abandoned, criticized, or rejected, their symptoms are expressed.
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Why are people with borderline personality treated unfairly?

This finding suggests that people with BPD are viewed harshly due to their apparent lack of control over their behavior and emotions. People with schizophrenia, by contrast, suffer from hallucinations and delusions that, by virtue of their seriousness, would seem less controllable.
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How do you respond to BPD anger?

How to Help
  1. Be patient.
  2. Be realistic.
  3. Try to separate facts from feelings.
  4. Validate feelings first.
  5. Listen actively and be sympathetic.
  6. Seek to distract when emotions rise.
  7. Do not allow yourself to be the product of the intense anger; attempt to diffuse it but sometimes you may have to walk away.
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Do borderlines have regrets?

Although BPD personalities initiate a break-up as a way of seeking validation, because of the intense anxiety at play, they'll often express intense regret because of their abandonment wounding, especially if they're not met with the response they desire.
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Do borderlines trust?

People who suffer from BPD show erratic mood-swings and find it difficult to trust and understand the motives of others. As a result, they suffer from fraught personal relationships with friends, colleagues and partners.
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Do borderlines overthink?

The young woman with BPD told Elite Daily, “Long story short, it's very hard for those with BPD to have successful and healthy relationships and stable confidence levels. Our version of 'logical thinking' is most often overthinking. We have a very hard time distinguishing between real issues or imaginary issues.
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Are borderlines loyal?

We're loyal partners and friends

Though there's often an assumption that we have unstable relationships – and in fact this is listed as one of the main symptoms of BPD – we are extremely loyal. As mentioned above, we tend to put ourselves last. Relationships are truly important to us, and our loyalty is strong.
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What are BPD toxic behaviors?

BPD and NPD Toxic Codependent Relationship Patterns

Both BPD and NPD behavior patterns include swift mood swings, impulsive behavior, sudden anger and aggression, potential violence, substance abuse, and a great fear of being abandoned.
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