Why are people with trauma attracted to each other?

This is the premise of trauma bonding
bonding
It is the process of nurturing social connection. Bonding typically refers to the process of attachment that develops between romantic or platonic partners, close friends, or parents and children. This bond is characterised by emotions such as affection and trust. Any two people who spend time together may form a bond.
https://en.wikipedia.org › wiki › Human_bonding
. Some theories suggest this is our subconscious mind trying to resolve old wounds. Even minor traumas, like the feeling “my parents never heard me,” can lead you to be attracted to, or hypersensitive to, someone who struggles to be present with you.
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Can two people trauma bond to each other?

Trauma bonding is a type of attachment that can form between two people who have gone through a traumatic experience together. Or, more likely, you may share a compatible attachment pattern that stems from childhood emotional trauma. This bond is characterized by feelings of dependency, neediness, and fear.
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Can two people with trauma date?

Educate each other and share. Trauma impacts everyone a bit differently, which means no two people with PTSD experience the same triggers or symptoms. For this reason, it's important for romantic partners who have experienced trauma to educate each other and share how their past impacts them.
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What is it called when two people bond over trauma?

Trauma bonding is the formation of an unhealthy bond between a person living with abuse and their abuser. Trauma bonds are not just found in romantic relationships. They can happen between family members, friends, and even coworkers.
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Does shared trauma make people fall in love?

Suffering, hurt, and trauma have always been the primordial reasons for intense connection, as these emotions were considered selfless, sacrificing, and empathetic. That's one common reason that people bond easily over similar trauma.
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The science of attraction - Dawn Maslar



Are people with trauma attracted to each other?

This is the premise of trauma bonding. Some theories suggest this is our subconscious mind trying to resolve old wounds. Even minor traumas, like the feeling “my parents never heard me,” can lead you to be attracted to, or hypersensitive to, someone who struggles to be present with you.
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How can you tell if someone is trauma bonded to you?

Signs of trauma bonding

They may also: agree with the abusive person's reasons for treating them badly. try to cover for the abusive person. argue with or distance themselves from people trying to help, such as friends, family members, or neighbors.
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What are the 7 stages of trauma bonding?

First, we will explore the 7-stages of trauma bonding.
  • Love Bombing. At the start of the relationship, did they shower you with excess love, appreciation and gifts? ...
  • Trust and Dependency. ...
  • Criticism. ...
  • Gaslighting. ...
  • Resigning to Control. ...
  • Loss of Self. ...
  • Addiction. ...
  • Stop the Secret Self Blame.
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What is the relationship between two traumatized people?

A "trauma bond" is an attachment formed between two people who unconsciously bond to each other based on shared trauma. Traumatic bonds are typically established in abusive childhoods and are learned as a product of intermittent positive and negative reinforcement.
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Is trauma bonding real?

Trauma bonding is a human emotional response, not a character flaw, and it can occur within abusive cycles to anyone. Disclosing your experience may provide you with a sense of relief once you see how empathetic those around you are about it.
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Can two people with trauma heal together?

Trauma-related conditions and behaviors are hard on everyone: both the person dealing with the trauma and the people around them. Trying to work through traumatic healing together is challenging, but not impossible. Regardless of when your partner experienced their trauma, working through it is a lifelong process.
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What is trauma dumping?

Trauma dumping is when someone shares traumatic details or events without another person's consent. Before confiding in someone, it's important to make sure that they can properly support you.
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Why are trauma bonds so powerful?

The cycle of being devalued and then rewarded over and over, works overtime to create a strong chemical and hormonal bond between a victim and his or her abuser. This is why victims of abuse often describe feeling more deeply bonded to their abuser than they do to people who actually consistently treat them well.
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What triggers a trauma bond?

Trauma bonding occurs when a narcissist repeats a cycle of abuse with another person which fuels a need for validation and love from the person being abused. Trauma bonding often happens in romantic relationships, however, it can also occur between colleagues, non-romantic family members, and friends.
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How hard is it to break a trauma bond?

Due to the toxic nature of a trauma bonded relationship, individuals suffering abuse will find it difficult to leave the relationship. Loved ones may have difficulty understanding why the person experiencing abuse does not just end the relationship. However, breaking free of a trauma bond often takes time and support.
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Is being clingy a trauma response?

Acting clingy

An individual might hold on to a relationship even though it consistently makes them feel frightened or unloved. Moreover, relational trauma can also lead people to feel and act clingy even when they're in a loving, stable relationship. This may occur with no obvious reasons for being insecure.
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Can trauma cause intimacy issues?

Traumatic events, on the other hand, can create the most complex and difficult cases of intimacy avoidance. And a few examples of these events include the following: Physical or sexual abuse. Verbal abuse.
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What does a traumatized person act like?

Initial reactions to trauma can include exhaustion, confusion, sadness, anxiety, agitation, numbness, dissociation, confusion, physical arousal, and blunted affect. Most responses are normal in that they affect most survivors and are socially acceptable, psychologically effective, and self-limited.
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What does breaking a trauma bond feel like?

Breaking a trauma bond can create similar effects to withdrawing from drugs and alcohol. The pain of separating oneself from a toxic relationship can be overwhelming. Some might even say that trauma bonds are the drugs that make abuse feel like love.
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What is the fastest way to break a trauma bond?

Outside of getting professional support, here are some steps you can take on your own to break free from a trauma bonded relationship:
  1. Educate Yourself. ...
  2. Focus on the Here and Now. ...
  3. Create Some Space. ...
  4. Find Support. ...
  5. Practice Good Self-Care. ...
  6. Make Future Plans. ...
  7. Develop Healthy Relationships. ...
  8. Give Yourself Permission to Heal.
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What is the most effective way to break a trauma bond?

The best way to combat this is garnering as much support as possible from friends or family. Breaking a trauma bond becomes much more possible when there are people aware of your situation who can provide empathy and help when it's asked for and needed.
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Can a trauma bond relationship turn healthy?

Unfortunately, transforming a trauma bond into a healthy attachment rarely happens, although it is possible to stop one from forming before it's too late. If you know that you are in a toxic relationship, seek help.
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How do you break a trauma bond cycle?

Face Your Feelings

By acknowledging your feelings, you are showing that you recognize and care about the way the dynamics in your trauma bond impact your emotions and mood. Once you identify your feelings and accept them, you can begin to work towards moving forward for yourself.
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Do narcissists feel the trauma bond?

Do Narcissists Also Feel the Trauma Bond? Abusive narcissists likely do feel the bond too, but differently. It's so confusing for anyone in a relationship with a narcissist who's abusive to understand why they continue to hurt them, even when they say they love them.
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