What trauma leads to codependency?

Childhood trauma is often a root cause of codependency. They don't always result, but for many people codependent relationships are a response to unaddressed past traumas. One reason may be that childhood trauma is usually family-centered: abuse, neglect, domestic violence, or even just divorce and fighting.
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Is codependency a result of PTSD?

Childhood trauma results from early abuse or neglect and can lead to a complex form of PTSD or attachment disorder. Primary symptoms include dissociation and intrusive memories. Codependency may be a symptom of or a defense against PTSD.
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What causes a person to become codependent?

Codependency issues typically develop when someone is raised by parents who are either overprotective or under protective. Overprotective parents may shield or protect their children from gaining the confidence they need to be independent in the world.
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Does emotional neglect cause codependency?

While some people learned how to have healthy attachments to people in our lives, others learned codependency based on how they were treated and cared for or neglected. This is what psychologists refer to as attachment theory.
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What is the difference between trauma bonding and codependency?

In order to heal and find trauma resolution, a person must be able and willing to see how their compulsive behavior only aids in forming trauma bonds and therefore they must break the compulsivity. Codependency on the other hand, focuses more on the addiction.
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Codependency and Childhood Trauma



What is the root of codependency?

Codependency is usually rooted in childhood. Often, a child grows up in a home where their emotions are ignored or punished. This emotional neglect can give the child low self-esteem and shame. They may believe their needs are not worth attending to.
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How does codependency start in childhood?

Childhood Trauma and Codependency

Children who grow up with parents who don't provide a healthy environment and don't get their needs met, learn to distort reality. Children want and need to be loved, so they find ways to get it.
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Are codependents narcissists?

[i] Although most narcissists can be classified as codependent, the reverse isn't true – most codependents aren't narcissists. They don't exhibit common traits of exploitation, entitlement, and lack of empathy.
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How does trauma affect attachment?

Attachment trauma often leads to a “disoriented- disorganized” attachment. A disorganized attachment pattern in turn imparts an increased risk of further abuse and neglect. Attachment traumata, however, do not happen in an empty social context.
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How do you break the cycle of codependency?

Some healthy steps to healing your relationship from codependency include:
  1. Start being honest with yourself and your partner. ...
  2. Stop negative thinking. ...
  3. Don't take things personally. ...
  4. Take breaks. ...
  5. Consider counseling. ...
  6. Rely on peer support. ...
  7. Establish boundaries.
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What are 10 characteristics of a codependent person?

Signs of codependency include:
  • Difficulty making decisions in a relationship.
  • Difficulty identifying your feelings.
  • Difficulty communicating in a relationship.
  • Valuing the approval of others more than valuing yourself.
  • Lacking trust in yourself and having poor self-esteem.
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How do you break a trauma bond?

Outside of getting professional support, here are some steps you can take on your own to break free from a trauma bonded relationship:
  1. Educate Yourself. ...
  2. Focus on the Here and Now. ...
  3. Create Some Space. ...
  4. Find Support. ...
  5. Practice Good Self-Care. ...
  6. Make Future Plans. ...
  7. Develop Healthy Relationships. ...
  8. Give Yourself Permission to Heal.
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Is codependency a learned behavior?

Co-dependency is a learned behavior that can be passed down from one generation to another. It is an emotional and behavioral condition that affects an individual's ability to have a healthy, mutually satisfying relationship.
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How do you know its a trauma bond?

Signs and Symptoms of Trauma Bonding
  1. An abuse victim covers up or makes excuses to others for an abuser's behavior.
  2. An abuse victim lies to friends or family about the abuse.
  3. A victim doesn't feel comfortable with or able to leave the abusive situation.
  4. An abuse victim thinks the abuse is their fault.
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How do you heal codependency?

It takes time and involves the following four steps:
  1. Abstinence. Abstinence or sobriety is necessary to recover from codependency. ...
  2. Awareness. It's said that denial is the hallmark of addiction. ...
  3. Acceptance. Healing essentially involves self-acceptance. ...
  4. Action. Insight without action only gets you so far.
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Why do codependents love narcissists?

Like human magnets, codependents and narcissists continue their rocky and seemingly unstable relationship because of their opposite dance roles or, as I refer to them, their “magnetic roles.” The lasting bond created by these perfectly matched human magnets or dysfunctional dancers is interminably powerful, binding ...
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What childhood trauma causes attachment issues?

Early attachment trauma is a distressing or harmful experience that affects a child's ability to form healthy interpersonal relationships. It includes abuse, abandonment, and neglect of an infant or child prior to age two or three. These traumas can have subtle yet long-lasting effects on a person's emotional health.
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What does childhood trauma look like?

Traumatic experiences can initiate strong emotions and physical reactions that can persist long after the event. Children may feel terror, helplessness, or fear, as well as physiological reactions such as heart pounding, vomiting, or loss of bowel or bladder control.
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What does attachment trauma look like in adults?

As a result of attachment trauma, you might carry beliefs that you are damaged, not lovable, or that you cannot trust anyone. You might have feelings of shame, unworthiness, or helplessness. Perhaps, you feel plagued by anxiety or believe that you don't belong in this world.
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Are codependents nice people?

Codependents are nice. If you are codependent, people will usually describe you as sweet, loyal and selfless. But if you were to plunge an emotional stethoscope into the core of the codependent, you'd likely find fear, loneliness and neediness that runs contrary to their “I'm so nice and together” image.
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Are codependents self centered?

Codependency and Narcissism May Have More in Common Than You Think. Much of self-help literature portrays codependency and narcissism as polar opposites. Codependency is often associated with excess selflessness. Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is often linked to excess selfishness.
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Are codependents manipulative?

Codependents have trouble being direct and assertive and may use manipulation to get their way. They may say whatever they think someone wants to hear to get along or be loved, but then later they do what they want. This is also passive-aggressive behavior.
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What are the signs of a codependent child?

In order to counteract codependency, it's important to know the common warning signs of a codependent child:
  • low self-esteem.
  • the need to be in control.
  • an excessive need to please others.
  • anxiety and stress.
  • extreme worry.
  • not feeling "good enough"
  • non-assertive communication.
  • blaming self for others' problems.
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Do codependent parents create codependent children?

The child's personality is developed around the control and needs of the codependent parent. The child has no true sense of self which is discouraged by the codependent parent. This can cause the child to also become codependent and entangled in the relationship.
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Can parents make their kids codependent?

You manipulate your child's emotions

Codependent parents may unknowingly (or knowingly but not maliciously) use many psychological strategies to get their child to do what they want: Passive-aggressive behavior. This is when a parent is being indirectly aggressive toward their child.
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