What is it like to be married to someone with BPD?

Living with someone who has borderline personality disorder (BPD) can feel confusing and cause anxiety in your relationship. It often leads to rifts in personal relationships and even poses problems in maintaining employment, which can lead to further turbulence due to financial woes.
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on mccaberussell.com


Can you stay married to someone with borderline personality disorder?

By an average age of about 40, the divorce rate for people with BPD is around 35%, and this is comparable to the divorce rate for the average U.S. citizen. However, people with BPD are far less likely to remarry after a divorce.
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on verywellmind.com


Can someone with BPD have a successful marriage?

“Clinicians should know that people with BPD can successfully marry or live with a partner in a stable relationship and become parents.
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on borderlinepersonalitydisorder.org


How does BPD affect marriage?

The effects of BPD are most severe in intimate relationships. The spousal relationship is perhaps the most intimate of all. This is because individuals with BPD tend to suffer painful feelings of emptiness almost all the time. They desperately seek out others to make them feel whole.
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on psychologytoday.com


How do I live with my husband with borderline personality disorder?

Finding Relief if You're Facing Relationship Problems Due to Borderline Personality Disorder
  1. Seek out information. ...
  2. Get help. ...
  3. Practice healthy communication. ...
  4. Ask open-ended questions. ...
  5. Talk only when your partner is calm. ...
  6. Offer support. ...
  7. Avoid labeling or blaming. ...
  8. Take threats seriously.
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on everydayhealth.com


The Rule That's Keeping My Marriage Healthy (and I Have BPD) | HealthyPlace



What is the average length of a BPD relationship?

Results found in a 2014 study found the average length of a BPD relationship between those who either married or living together as partners was 7.3 years. However, there are cases where couples can stay together for 20+ years.
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on theprivatetherapyclinic.co.uk


Should I stay with someone who has borderline personality disorder?

Enable the person with BPD by protecting them from the consequences of their actions. If your loved one won't respect your boundaries and continues to make you feel unsafe, then you may need to leave. It doesn't mean you don't love them, but your self-care should always take priority.
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on helpguide.org


Why do borderlines hurt the ones they love?

Often, the borderline person is unaware of how they feel when their feelings surface, so they displace their feelings onto others as causing them. They may not realise that their feelings belong within them, so they think that their partner is responsible for hurting them and causing them to feel this way.
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on mentalhealthcenter.com


Is BPD a reason for divorce?

Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is relatively common, so it often becomes a factor during divorce. Further, the characteristics of BPD may contribute to divorce in the first place. By the time you decide to divorce your spouse with BPD, it's safe to assume you'll be facing conflict during your divorce.
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on micklinlawgroup.com


How to detach from someone with borderline personality disorder?

How to Navigate Relationships with People with BPD
  1. 1: Leave the abuser. ...
  2. 2: Do not try to endure your suffering alone. ...
  3. 3: Set boundaries. ...
  4. 4: Help address “emptiness.” Without becoming the therapist of the one with borderline symptoms, talk about the underlying feelings that so often throw him or her into darkness.
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on psychologytoday.com


Is it healthy to date someone with BPD?

Anyone living with BPD can still lead satisfying lives and take pleasure in long-term relationships and even life partnerships. With the proper treatment and support, people with BPD can and do have healthy and happy relationships.
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on taylorcounselinggroup.com


Who is a good match for BPD?

For someone with BPD, the favorite person is deemed the most important person in their life. This person can be anyone, but it's often a romantic partner, family member, good friend, or another supportive person (like a coach, therapist, or teacher).
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on choosingtherapy.com


Why is it so hard to leave a borderline?

Their wild mood swings, angry outbursts, chronic abandonment fears, and impulsive and irrational behaviors can leave loved ones feeling helpless, abused, and off balance. Partners and family members of people with BPD often describe the relationship as an emotional roller coaster with no end in sight.
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on thehealthyjournal.com


Can people with BPD be good mothers?

People with borderline personality disorder can be very effective and nurturing parents, but because the symptoms of BPD can be very intense, for many people this does take some work.
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on verywellmind.com


Do borderlines regret the loss of a quality partner?

Do borderlines regret the loss of a quality partner? No, they often regret the decision to let that partner go. People who suffer from a borderline personality disorder (BPD) often have intense and unstable relationships. They may idealize their partners one minute and then devalue them the next.
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on thehealthyjournal.com


Why is borderline personality disorder so serious?

Borderline personality disorder can damage many areas of your life. It can negatively affect intimate relationships, jobs, school, social activities and self-image, resulting in: Repeated job changes or losses. Not completing an education.
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on mayoclinic.org


What are the effects of living with someone with borderline personality disorder?

Living with someone with borderline personality disorder can mean working through spurts of intense anger, false accusations, and potentially harmful impulsivity.
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on psychcentral.com


How to deal with an ex wife with borderline personality disorder?

Keep the emotional charge out of your voice and body language, tell only what needs to be told, and don't share your feelings about your ex. Be consistent with limit setting. BPDs have poor boundaries; they often don't recognize that there's a line between themselves and others.
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on weinbergerlawgroup.com


What are the best jobs for someone with BPD?

Many people with BPD feel emotions deeply and find working in a caring role fulfilling. If you are an empathetic person, consider jobs such as teaching, childcare, nursing and animal care.
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on apm.net.au


Are borderlines sadistic?

Borderlines often go crazier if you push them to look at their own sadistic tendencies. A classic example is a marriage fight I've seen hundreds of times—a normal neurotic husband forgets the couple's anniversary (or is late to the restaurant, or tells his friends that his wife had breast surgery, or…).
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on drkeithwitt.com


Can people with BPD be abusive?

Those diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) or those with BPD who may not even know they have it, are more likely than the general population to be verbally, emotionally/psychologically, physically abusive.
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on mentalhealthcenter.com


Is it hard to be in a relationship with someone who has BPD?

Dating someone with borderline personality disorder (BPD) can be difficult at times, but it doesn't have to be something that harms your relationship. BPD symptoms can include complex and unhealthy thought processes, anxiety, poor self-image, and dramatic mood swings.
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on talkspace.com


What is the BPD friendship cycle?

“A BPD relationship cycle refers to a repeating, continuous series of highs and lows in a relationship,” explains Tabitha Cranie, a retired MD from St. Petersburg, Florida. “First, everything feels good, uplifting, and safe — they might think of you as their favorite person.”
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on psychcentral.com


How do you make someone with BPD feel loved?

In order to foster a strong bond, it's important to know how to love someone with borderline personality disorder in a way that nurtures both of you.
  1. Acknowledge the Realness of BPD. ...
  2. Make Room for Yourself. ...
  3. Stop Rescuing. ...
  4. Encourage High-Quality Treatment. ...
  5. Treatment at Bridges to Recovery.
Takedown request   |   View complete answer on bridgestorecovery.com
Next question
Is There Hope for hair loss?