What is a shiva call?

A shiva call is an essential part of Jewish funeral customs for both the mourner and their community. Shiva is a seven-day mourning period that begins immediately after the funeral concludes. The word shiva means 'seven' and signifies that the mourner will grieve for a specific seven-day period.
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What to do during a shiva call?

Visiting the Mourners -- Practical Tips on Visiting a Shiva Home
  • Whichever type of shiva home you encounter, there are some basic guidelines for making a shiva call. ...
  • Dress appropriately. ...
  • Wash your hands. ...
  • Just walk in. ...
  • Take food to the kitchen. ...
  • Find the mourners. ...
  • Participate in the service. ...
  • If invited, eat.
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What do you say at a shiva call?

Before leaving, one stands up, approaches the mourner and recites, “HaMakom yenacheim etchem betoch sha'ar aveiliei Tzion v'Yerushalayim”—May the Almighty comfort you among those who mourn for Zion and Jerusalem.
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How long should you stay at a shiva call?

After the interment, mourners return home to sit Shiva for seven days. Shiva is a Hebrew word for seven. During the Shiva week, mourners are expected to remain at home. There are seven relatives for whom a Jew is required to observe Shiva: father, mother, brother or sister, son, daughter, or spouse.
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Do you wear black to a shiva call?

You don't have to wear black to a shiva house, but your attire should always be respectful. Keep your visit short—It's not how long you stay, but that you pay the visit.
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Why Do Jews Sit Shiva?



Is it appropriate to bring something to a Shiva?

Kosher cookies, cakes, candies, nuts are all welcome at shiva as long as they are crowd pleasers and easy to serve. Jewish custom discourages sending flowers or gifts other than food when people are sitting Shiva. In fact, Shiva begins with seudat havra'ah, "the meal of consolation," prepared by family and neighbors.
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Do you drink during Shiva?

Food for the Shiva

Once that first meal of condolence concludes, there are no food restrictions for mourners. Some may refrain from anything associated with happiness and festivity, like wine. However, this is not prohibited.
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What not to say at a shiva house?

A mourner is not greeted with “shalom” or “shalom Aleichem” because he is not at peace. Similarly, the mourner he should not greet others in this way. Not only that, not even visitors to the shiva house should greet one another in this fashion (Aruch HaShulchan YD 385:4).
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Is it better to go to funeral or shiva?

Attending a funeral or making a shiva call does not replace attending a shiva in person. If you live in the same state, it is customary to attend the funeral, make a shiva call, and attend the shiva. This shows the family and your community that you are present in times of suffering.
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Can you take food out of a shiva house?

There is a prevalent custom not to remove anything from a shiva house; this includes even retrieving items that had previously been borrowed by the mourner. There are many variations of this practice. For example, some are lenient when it comes to food, while others rule stringently.
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What happens when you sit shiva?

Most people gather to comfort the family who has lost someone. It is also a time for everyone to share stories about the deceased. Conversations generally center around the family and listening to their memories. Shiva is held for family and friends to begin the healing process.
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How do you pay respects at shiva?

Sitting Shiva Etiquette
  1. Find the Right Time to Visit. Check with friends or family at the end of the funeral service for the right time(s) to visit. ...
  2. Dress Appropriately. ...
  3. Wash Your Hands. ...
  4. Just Walk In. ...
  5. Bring or Send Food.
  6. Find the Mourner. ...
  7. Talk to Friends. ...
  8. Consider the Length of Your Visit.
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What to expect during shiva?

Shiva is the week long period of mourning following a loved one's death. During this time, family members traditionally gather in one home to receive visitors. The word “shiva” means seven, signifying the seven day mourning period in which mourners are supposed to sit low to the ground.
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How long do you sit shiva for a spouse?

The shiva meaning is literally “seven” – a period of seven days when a Jewish family has a formal mourning time to honor their loved one. According to Jewish law, individuals should sit shiva after losing a parent, spouse, sibling, or child.
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Can you bring flowers to a shiva?

For example, in many traditions, it is customary to send flowers to a funeral home or directly to immediate family members of the deceased. In the Jewish tradition, though, that is generally discouraged—it's extremely rare that flowers would be sent to either the funeral home or the shiva home.
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What color do you wear to a shiva?

In that vein, there is no requirement to wear black, nor do you need to worry if your outfit is a little too colorful. The key for dressing to go to a shiva is to be respectful of the family in mourning. And that can vary from family to family.
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Do you wear shoes at a shiva?

In some customs, the mourners refrain from wearing leather shoes. Some wear shoes of canvas or cloth. Others wear no shoes at all during shiva. Visitors may wear whatever footwear is appropriate, but should not wear non-leather shoes unless appropriate with the outfit worn.
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Can you wear shorts to a shiva?

There is no specific dress code. Dressing respectfully is a must though. This means women should be conservative and men should wear long pants. If Shiva is being held in an orthodox home, many women will be dressed in long skirts below the knee and long sleeve shirt.
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Do you sit shiva for a pet?

The simple answer to your question is that there is no Jewish mourning ritual for an animal. There is nothing to stop you from taking time out of your ordinary schedule to reflect on your loss but you mustn't confuse this with the religious nature of a shivah ritual. Judaism has great compassion for animals.
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What time of day does shiva start?

What is Shiva? Shiva is a Hebrew word meaning "seven" and refers to a seven-day period of formalized mourning by the immediate family of the deceased. Shiva begins immediately after the burial and concludes a short time after the morning service (Shacharit) on the seventh day.
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Can you shower during Shiva?

Prohibited acts—Under Jewish law, those sitting Shiva are expressly prohibited from engaging in a number of activities, including: Leaving the Shiva home, except to attend synagogue on Shabbat. Shaving or cutting hair. Bathing (though basic hygiene is allowed)
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Why do you cover mirrors when someone dies?

In parts of Germany and in Belgium, it was long customary to cover mirrors with a white cloth because it was thought that if a person saw his or her image in a mirror after a death in the household, that person would die shortly.
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Is sitting Shiva in the Bible?

"Sitting" shiva

As mentioned in the Book of Job, upon mourning, Job's friends "sat down with him upon the ground seven days and seven nights". Therefore, originally, individuals who were observing a period of mourning were required to turn couches or beds over and sit on the ground.
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Can Jews be cremated?

If a person chooses to be cremated, most Reform Jewish cemeteries today will allow their remains to be buried in Jewish cemeteries, although often they stipulate that the cremains must still be buried in a coffin. Jews may choose cremation for a variety of reasons, including cost and travel concerns.
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What do you say when leaving a shiva house?

What do you say when leaving a shiva house? It is customary to say to the mourners: Ha-Makom ye-nachem etchem be-toch she'ar avelay Tziyon vi-Yerushala'yim. May the Lord comfort you together with all mourners of Zion and Jerusalem.”
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