What causes a favorite person in BPD?

For a person with BPD there are significant fears of abandonment and they will attach to a favourite person and rely on this person for emotional validation and security. Their favourite person becomes the source of their comfort and devotion.
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How does a Favourite person develop BPD?

In most instances, favorite persons are crushes, partners, friends, or other people who the pwBPD interacts within their life (teachers, for instance). The term “favorite person” is unique to the BPD community because of the unhealthy attachment the pwBPD has towards their favorite person.
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Do borderlines choose their favorite person?

The individual with BPD wants their favorite person's attention as much as possible, and the quality of the relationship can undoubtedly shape their mood, confidence, and sense of security.
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How do you detach from a favorite borderline personality disorder?

Be grateful that you had your favorite person, for as long as you did. Think about what experiences and lessons you have learned from that person. Practice personal gratitude for the time you had together, rather than demonizing that former favorite person. When you are in a better state of mind, you will move on.
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Can someone with BPD love you?

Borderline personality disorder (BPD) isn't a personal choice. It's a mental health condition, and it can be managed. Can a person with borderline personality disorder feel love? Absolutely!
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Favorite Person



How do borderlines think?

People with BPD also have a tendency to think in extremes, a phenomenon called "dichotomous" or “black-or-white” thinking. 2 People with BPD often struggle to see the complexity in people and situations and are unable to recognize that things are often not either perfect or horrible, but are something in between.
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What does it mean when someone says your their favorite person?

“Favorite person,” or “FP” is a term used commonly in the borderline community. Borderline personality disorder community, that is. A lot of people have a favorite person, someone they share their life with, trust more than others.
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How do you stop borderline splitting?

Caring and Management
  1. Cultivate empathy. Start by reminding yourself that splitting is part of the disorder. ...
  2. Encourage and support treatment. ...
  3. Maintain lines of communication. ...
  4. Remind your loved one that you care. ...
  5. Set boundaries. ...
  6. Take care of yourself. ...
  7. Try to manage your response.
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What does a BPD episode look like?

Impulsive and often dangerous behaviors, such as spending sprees, unsafe sex, substance abuse, reckless driving and binge eating. Recurring suicidal behaviors or threats or self-harming behavior, such as cutting. Intense and highly changeable moods, with each episode lasting from a few hours to a few days.
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How can you tell if a woman is borderline?

Recognizing Borderline Personality Disorder in Yourself—or Others
  1. Instability in Relationships. Intense and short-lived relationships are common for people with BPD. ...
  2. Extreme Emotional Swings. ...
  3. Explosive Feelings of Anger. ...
  4. Self-Harm. ...
  5. Lingering Feelings of Emptiness or Worthlessness. ...
  6. Feeling Out of Touch With Reality.
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Do borderlines cry a lot?

Compared to non-patients, BPD patients showed the anticipated higher crying frequency despite a similar crying proneness and ways of dealing with tears. They also reported less awareness of the influence of crying on others.
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How do you know if your borderline is lying?

Here are a few of the issues at the root of lying in BPD.
  1. Intense Emotions. People with BPD experience intense emotions that they can't regulate; this often distorts their perceptions. ...
  2. Impulsivity. ...
  3. Shame. ...
  4. Distorted Self-Perceptions. ...
  5. Rejection Sensitivity. ...
  6. Romantic Relationships.
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How does a borderline react to no contact?

Along with high emotions - the borderline partner's fear of abandonment may be triggered and they may try harder to hold onto the relationship - or possibly they won't be able to cope and will seek retribution.
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Are borderlines psychopaths?

BPD features are highly represented in subjects with psychopathy as well as psychopathic traits are highly prevalent in patients with BPD.
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Do BPD know they split?

Care and Management of BPD Splitting

Remember that splitting is a symptom of borderline personality disorder - while it can be difficult not to take their words and actions personally, remember that the person is not intentionally trying to hurt you.
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Why do BPD end relationships?

BPD splitting destroys relationships because the behaviour can be impulsive or reckless in order to alleviate the pain, often hurting loved ones in the process. It can feel like everyone abandons or hurts them, often causing them to look for evidence, and creating problems from nothing.
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What is favorite person syndrome?

This is where the term “favorite person” comes from in the borderline community. There is usually one of two people that we absolutely idolize and want to spend all our time with, and if they are busy and can't spend time with us we tend to get angry and feel abandoned.
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How do you become someone's favorite person?

10 Simple Ways to Make People Like You More
  1. Ask questions. I've noticed people who ask questions are often well-liked. ...
  2. Talk more, not less. ...
  3. Give your time…gratis. ...
  4. Listen better. ...
  5. Really and truly care. ...
  6. Admit it, you don't know everything. ...
  7. Go for the laugh, every time. ...
  8. Lighten up.
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What does FP mean in BPD?

Now let's look at BPD and apply that same logic, yes we seek attention, there is fear of abandonment, we have what is called an FP (favorite person) of whom we attach our existence to and rely on for emotional validation, we have trouble regulating our moods, splitting, identity confusion, and intense emotion.
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Do people with BPD change their minds a lot?

Constant changes of mind.

People with BPD might find that they constantly change their mind about things, whether it's their feelings towards the people around them, or other areas of their life, such as their goals, ambitions or sexuality.
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What can BPD be confused with?

Some symptoms of BPD can be very similar to other mental health problems, including:
  • bipolar disorder.
  • complex post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
  • depression.
  • psychosis.
  • antisocial personality disorder (ASPD)
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Are people with BPD smart?

Many people with BPD are deep thinkers, intuitive feelers, and many are intellectually gifted. Contrary to popular belief, most BPD sufferers are highly introspective and self-aware. With a process of healing and transformations, they can be the most empathic leaders and visionaries.
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Do borderlines regret the loss of a quality partner?

People with BPD may be sensitive to rejection and abandonment and are prone to splitting, rage, and impulsivity. If a person with BPD feels rejected or abandoned, they may end the relationship. However, this is usually followed by significant anxiety and regret and efforts to get back together.
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Why do BPD relationships not work?

Borderline personality disorder can impact relationships.

These relationships end because the person's behaviors become too much for the other person to handle. “Relationships with an untreated BPD individual can feel exhausting, a never-ending process of putting out fires,” says Gilbert.
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Should I be friends with someone with BPD?

In the long term, however, it is more helpful for a person with BPD to have a consistent, reliable friend than to have a friend who was 100% there for them for a few months before disappearing forever.
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