Is it easier to forgive or forget?

In most situations, it may be easier to forgive than to forget, though neither one is really a simple task. "To forgive and forget means you've finally made peace with the offense that's occurred and have allowed yourself to move forward," bestselling author and relationship expert Susan Winter tells Elite Daily.
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Is forgive or forget harder?

But according to recent psychological research, the better we are at controlling our thoughts and behaviour and not retaliating, the easier it is to forgive. Crucially, such control enables us to free ourselves of the pain and hurt that can imprison us in our past.
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Is it better to forgive or forget?

“True forgiveness doesn't erase the wrongdoing but rather frees the person who was hurt.” So, forgetting has nothing to do with real forgiveness. Forgetting actually impedes it. “Pretending the wrongdoing never happened doesn't make the effects of it go away,” Hogan continued.
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Is it easy to forgive and forget?

It's hard to forgive and forget, but many people choose to try. You shouldn't rush to forget, because you need to work through the feelings first. It will be uncomfortable to face your emotions, but it's the only way you'll really be able to forgive someone.
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Can you truly forgive without forgetting?

Forgiving is Not Forgetting

You can forgive someone for their offenses against you even if you can't forget. It seems flippant to tell someone to just forgive and let it go when emotional and/or physical trauma has been experienced by the hand of another person.
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Is it easier to forgive than to forget?



What does the Bible say about forgiving and not forgetting?

In Matthew 6:14-15, “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”
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Why is it so difficult to forgive?

This doesn't make you a bad person—it just makes you human. Forgiveness is difficult in part because evolution has endowed us with the psychological motivation to avoid being exploited by others, and one of the easiest ways to prevent exploitation is to hit back or simply avoid the exploiter.
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Why is it so hard to forgive and forget?

We unconsciously layer the new hurt to the old hurt, until we are facing something too big and overwhelming to forgive and forget. For example, if our partner leaves us, we can experience feelings of rejection that can pile on top of unresolved experiences of abandonment from childhood.
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Is it OK to not forgive someone?

At the end of the day, whether or not to forgive is a choice only you can make, and not wanting to forgive doesn't make you a bad person. Instead of forcing yourself to forgive when those feelings aren't coming naturally, you can choose another method of coming to terms with trauma.
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Is it possible to truly forgive someone?

Many people have misconceptions about what forgiveness really means—and they may eschew it. Others may want to forgive, but wonder whether or not they truly can. Forgiveness does not necessarily come easily; but it is possible for many of us to achieve, if we have the right tools and are willing to put in the effort.
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What happens if you don't forgive?

The negative consequences of not forgiving has been documented in studies that show that it can lead to emotional pain of anger, hate, hurt, resentment, bitterness and so on and as a consequence can create health issues, affect relationships and stop us from experiencing the freedom that forgiveness enables.
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How do you truly forgive and let go?

Acknowledge your emotions about the harm done to you and how they affect your behavior, and work to release them. Choose to forgive the person who's offended you. Move away from your role as victim and release the control and power the offending person and situation have had in your life.
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How do you forgive and forget when someone hurts you?

Here are eight ways to work on that.
  1. Get mad, feel hurt and grieve. ...
  2. Ask yourself whether your anger is constructive or destructive. ...
  3. Don't worry—you aren't saying the offense was OK. ...
  4. Practice stress-reduction techniques. ...
  5. Remind yourself why you want this person in your life. ...
  6. Set boundaries.
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What personality type holds grudges?

Perhaps the most sensitive of all the personality types, INFJs take it hard when someone they trust lets them down. They tend to hold on to anger longer than they should and are capable of holding a grudge even when the other person has apologized, repeatedly, for their wrongdoing.
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What are the four stages of forgiveness?

4 Steps to Forgiveness
  • "To understand forgiveness, you must first understand what forgiveness is not," psychiatrist Dr. Ned Hallowell says in his book Dare to Forgive. ...
  • Pain and Hurt. Dr. ...
  • Reliving and Reflecting. ...
  • Working It Out. ...
  • Renounce Your Anger and Resentment.
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When should you stop forgiving someone?

If forgiving someone guarantees that they're back in your life, and if that puts those around you (like your children or family) at risk. If that person pressures you to partake in negative behaviors, for example, drinking if you're sober. If that person doesn't respect your boundaries.
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Should I forgive my ex for hurting me?

After a divorce, forgiving your ex is one of the best things you can do for yourself. Sometimes forgiveness is hard, especially in a difficult divorce. But, forgiving your ex is really more for you than for your ex. Forgiveness releases you to move on and build a new life.
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What is it called when you dont forgive someone?

If you describe someone as unforgiving, you mean that they are unwilling to forgive other people.
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Can you forgive someone and still not trust them?

Because forgiveness is about the past, you can forgive someone and not want to reconcile with or trust them ever again. (Those who tell you have to do both are lying to you.) You can forgive someone and reconcile too, while still struggling to trust them.
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Is it easy to forgive?

Forgiveness is not always easy, but it is healthy.

Not forgiving someone can harm you more than it harms the offending person. It can take a toll on both your emotional and physical well-being. While we may never forget that we were wronged, it is in our own best interest to forgive.
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How many times can you forgive someone?

Forgiveness Is Commanded by God

In Luke 17:4, Jesus says that you should forgive someone seven times in one day; that would work out to more than 2,500 acts of forgiveness each year, every year. The point is that you are not supposed to keep count, and there is no limit to how many times you should forgive your spouse.
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Is forgive and forget the same thing?

Forgiving vs Forgetting

Forgiving is learning to stop being angry and harboring resentment towards someone who has wronged us. Forgetting, on the other hand, is when we determine to repress what happened and move on.
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What does forgive but not forget mean?

I think Desmond Tutu may have said it best: “Forgiving is not forgetting; it's actually remembering — remembering and not using your right to hit back. It's a second chance for a new beginning. And the remembering part is particularly important. Especially if you don't want to repeat what happened.”
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What did Jesus say about forgiveness?

Jesus answered, 'I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times. ' " “You, Lord, are forgiving and good, abounding in love to all who call to you.” “And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”
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How do you forget someone who hurts you emotionally?

5 Ways to Let Go of Past Hurts
  1. Make the decision to let it go. Things don't disappear on their own. ...
  2. Express your pain — and your responsibility. ...
  3. Stop being the victim and blaming others. ...
  4. Focus on the present — the here and now — and joy. ...
  5. Forgive them — and yourself.
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