How does saying hurtful things affect a relationship?

Those harsh words said in fits of anger linger. Hurtful words can have a negative impact and begin to affect intimacy. The residual effects of the harsh and aggressive words begin to cause more anger and disconnect in the relationship.
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Is it normal to say hurtful things in a relationship?

Most often in relationships and marriages, hurtful things are said in frustration and anger. These are entirely normal feelings to have in long term relationships.
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How do I stop saying hurtful things to my partner?

Ask a Therapist: How Do I Stop Saying Hurtful Things I Don't Mean...
  1. Take Ownership.
  2. Catch Yourself.
  3. Develop a Plan Together.
  4. Work On Yourself.
  5. Practice Healthy Communication.
  6. Get Help.
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Why do I keep saying hurtful things to my boyfriend?

Low self-esteem

Those of us with low confidence levels can sometimes try to put others down in order to feel better about ourselves. Maybe your partner is jealous of your success, or wishes they were as confident as you in some things, so they try to bring you down by saying hurtful things.
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Can you forgive your partner for saying hurtful things?

"You can still find the words hurtful but forgive them because the are trying to help." Just make sure you let them know, so they can change their approach in the future.
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10 Signs Your Partner Doesn’t Love You (Even If You Think They Do)



How do you fix a relationship after hurtful words?

To help, experts offer nine tips for how to regain their trust.
  1. Own Up To Your Mistake — & Mistakes. ...
  2. Give Them As Much Time As They Need. ...
  3. Take Things Slowly. ...
  4. Be Gentle With Your Partner. ...
  5. Accept That Your Relationship May Have Permanently Changed. ...
  6. Be Fully Present. ...
  7. Listen To Your Partner. ...
  8. Try To Work Out Why You Hurt Them.
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Why do my spouse says hurtful things?

Why does my husband say things to hurt me? Perhaps it's because he is hurting himself. He may resent some of the things you do and it comes forth in hurtful words during a fight. He wants your attention so he is doing this or he might just be mean.
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What is the most hurtful thing you can say to someone?

Words are powerful weapons and can do a lot of damage. “ You're *#@! % stupid. ” “ I wish you were never born. ” “ No one is ever going to love you, you're so *#@! % fat and ugly. ” “ You never get anything right. ” “ You're worthless. ” These are mean and degrading things to say to someone.
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How do you stop yourself from saying something you regret?

How to avoid saying something you may regret later
  1. Humour helps.
  2. Count till ten.
  3. Leave the conversation.
  4. Do not initiate to break the silence.
  5. Share information only with appropriate audience.
  6. Don't rant about negative things.
  7. Respect, respect, and respect.
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What to do when you say something you regret to your boyfriend?

Be sure to include the words, “I'm sorry.” Many people find those two words extremely difficult to say, but a true apology will need them. 10. Validate their feelings. Let him/her know you “get it.” Say something like, “I know my comment sounded critical, and I understand why you're upset.”
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Why do I say hurtful things in an argument?

Understand that it's anger

Anger is usually the reason why people say hurtful things. Before you dissect those verbal attacks, or analyze the 'whys' and 'wherefores' of the negative behavior, it is best to understand where those words are coming from.
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How do you forgive hurtful words?

Path to forgive your husband for saying hurtful things
  1. Validate your emotions.
  2. Find a constructive relief.
  3. Examine the problem analytically.
  4. Focus on the positive.
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What do you do when you say something hurtful?

What to Do When You Say Something Hurtful That You Can't Take Back
  1. Apologize.
  2. Don't Make Excuses.
  3. Give Your Friend Some Time to Process Their Reaction.
  4. Accept That Your Friendship May Change Permanently.
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What should you not forgive in a relationship?

Attraction is one thing, but if they have nurtured a relationship with another person, then they have done so actively, and this, you should not forgive.
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Why do I say hurtful things without thinking?

For some people, social anxiety is a cause of unfiltered speech. This anxiety may cause you to feel so nervous that you say things you would never mention if you were in a more relaxed state. Your mind and body are more focused on fear and stress than they are on the words coming from your mouth.
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What is hostile venting?

From living in each other's hearts, they become verbal enemies, struggling to survive emotionally at the expense of the other. As their exchanges become more heated, they begin to lose touch with the effect of their words. They rationalize their righteous venting with little remorse or need to apologize.
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Why do I say things I don't mean when I'm angry?

In a fit of anger or in frustration, we say things we don't mean when we lose control of our emotions. We act first instead of thinking it through, and hurt the other person with our words. We all say things we don't mean - to our friends, family, or even strangers.
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How do you not say mean when angry?

Use "I" statements instead of "you" statements.
  1. Use calm words to convey your feelings, then give concrete examples of what made you feel that way and why. ...
  2. For example, you might say something like, "It really hurt my feelings when you said you didn't want to put up with me anymore.
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What to say to someone who has hurt you deeply?

If you're hoping to salvage the relationship with the person who has hurt you, then here are some great conversation points to add in:
  • “I care about you.”
  • “I respect you.”
  • “I want to fix our relationship.”
  • “I want to move past this.”
  • “I want to understand each other better.”
  • “I want to be open with you.”
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How do I tell my boyfriend that he hurt my feelings?

The Most Productive Way To Tell Someone They've Hurt You
  1. Organize Your Thoughts First. ...
  2. Give Them a Heads Up Before You Talk. ...
  3. Consider Your Environment. ...
  4. Try A Three-Part Statement Approach. ...
  5. Avoid Re-Hashing a Fight. ...
  6. Don't Be Afraid To Take A Break.
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How do you know when your husband doesn't love you anymore?

Signs your husband isn't in love with you:
  • He's no longer affectionate with you.
  • He spends a lot of time alone or out of the house.
  • He doesn't really engage in conversation with you anymore.
  • He's become closed off.
  • He no longer goes out of his way to care for your relationship.
  • Identify what's changed.
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When your partner hurt your feelings?

Try explaining the exact words they used that hurt you, but express your hurt feelings calmly rather than with anger. It's totally OK to be angry, but when communicating with your partner, it might be easier to get your message across if you can avoid lashing out at them.
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Is my husband a gaslighter?

Gaslighting spouses turn the tables and blame you for their poor behavior. They distort the narrative to make you appear to be the one mistreating them. For example, if you work overtime, you neglect them and do not want to spend time with them. Therefore, you must be having an affair.
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What are the signs of a broken relationship?

7 Warning Signs You're In a Failing Relationship
  • Resentment. Resentment grows when someone feels unheard or dismissed. ...
  • Disrespect. Mutual respect is a cornerstone of all successful relationships. ...
  • Dishonesty. ...
  • Mistrust. ...
  • Distancing. ...
  • Defensiveness. ...
  • Contempt.
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How do you become strong when someone hurts you emotionally?

They will help you develop some new techniques and keep you from reacting to new hurts in old ways.
  1. Recognize the offense for what it is. ...
  2. Resist the tendency to defend your position. ...
  3. Give up the need to be right. ...
  4. Recognize and apologize for anything you may have done to contribute to the situation. ...
  5. Respond, don't react.
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