How do you outsmart a flying monkey?

How to fend off narcissistic flying monkeys
  1. Hold on to your own reality. ...
  2. Invite some non-gaslighters into your life. ...
  3. Disengage from the narcissist and their enablers or flying monkeys. ...
  4. Consider therapy. ...
  5. Stop giving the benefit of the doubt and the second chances.
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How do you deal with flying monkeys?

Don't let it. Stop playing. The best way to get rid of a flying monkey is to run their comments through a filter of truth, educate them if you can, and always refuse to play their games.
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What do you say to a narcissist flying monkey?

This strategy can be used with both the narcissist and their flying monkeys. Show them all the personality of a grey rock. Give one-word answers like “Yeah” or short answers like “I'm doing OK.” Don't share anything that is going on in your life. Responses should be completely emotionless.
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How do narcissists Control flying monkeys?

When the narcissist wants to evoke some punishment on a target they dispatch their henchmen (aka flying monkeys) to do their bidding. Unfortunately, this can and often does include abusive behavior such as guilt-tripping, twisting the truth, gaslighting, assaults, threats, and violence.
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Do flying monkeys apologize?

As a general rule, flying monkeys support the narcissist, they try to manipulate the victim into reconciling with the narcissist, flying monkeys apologize for the narcissist, they participate in the narcissist's smear campaign of the victim, and if needed, they help dismantle the no contact method.
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How to handle flying monkeys



How can you tell if someone is a flying monkey?

Flying monkeys often have strong narcissistic traits themselves, including a desire for attention, a lack of empathy, and a desire to bully and manipulate others.
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What is word salad narcissist?

NPD Meaning: The term narcissistic word salad is essentially a misuse of an important psychological term. Instead of referring to an involuntary verbal sign of a severe mental illness, such as schizophrenia, it is being used as a slang term for a type of narcissistic speech that is purposefully confusing.
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Do flying monkeys ever see truth?

Eventually flying monkeys will see the truth because they're simply a tool a narcissist uses to temporarily protect their fragile ego. Once the flying monkey has served their purpose, the narcissist will discard them as they do everyone else.
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How do you react to narcissistic triangulation?

How to respond
  1. Have a direct conversation. Pulling triangulation out into the light can be tough, particularly when you dislike any type of conflict and the other person seems to want to purposefully undermine you or treat you poorly. ...
  2. Establish your own support. ...
  3. Set boundaries.
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How do you gray rock a narcissist?

How to use the grey rock method
  1. Stay neutral and disengaged.
  2. Don't give them your attention.
  3. Keep interactions short and sweet.
  4. Don't give away personal information.
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How do you respond to a narcissist smear campaign?

Let them know you are the target of a smear campaign and to not believe what your ex is saying about you. Inform them your ex is creating “spin” to the point that what they are saying is fiction and a waste of time to believe. Be forthright, convincing, and firm. State your side once, then let it go.
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What are narcissist most afraid of?

Narcissists are terrified of being alone, and their greatest fear is abandonment. Setting clear boundaries or not reacting to their chaotic manipulation will cause them to become afraid of losing you even though they may never admit it.
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What are the weaknesses of a narcissist?

The 10 biggest weaknesses of narcissists
  • 1) Poor listening skills. The biggest narcissistic weak point I want to focus on is listening skills. ...
  • 2) Unable to accept criticism. ...
  • 3) Major impatience. ...
  • 4) Lack of focus. ...
  • 5) Inability to understand other people's feelings. ...
  • 6) Intense stubbornness. ...
  • 7) Greed. ...
  • 8) Disingenuous.
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What to say to disarm a narcissist?

What to Say to Disarm a Narcissist
  • “I don't agree with you, but you have a right to have your opinion. ...
  • “You are certainly entitled to your opinion. ...
  • “We can agree to disagree.”
  • “We will work on this together.”
  • “Let me ask your advice on this. ...
  • “I hear what you're saying.”
  • “I'm sorry you feel that way.”
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How do you confuse a narcissist?

11 Ways to Confuse and Disarm a Narcissist
  1. 1 Be unpredictable.
  2. 2 Say “no” when they ask for favors.
  3. 3 Remove all emotion from your reactions to them.
  4. 4 Bore them with the “gray rock” treatment.
  5. 5 Guard your sensitive information closely.
  6. 6 Walk away while they're talking.
  7. 7 Cut off all communication.
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How do you trigger a narcissistic rage?

What Triggers a Narcissist?
  1. Getting caught doing something dishonest or mean.
  2. Being held accountable for their actions.
  3. Not being the center of attention.
  4. Any form of criticism — no matter how constructive or accurate.
  5. Being exposed as a manipulator or liar.
  6. A sense of not being in control.
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How do narcissists control conversations?

A narcissist communicator allows little or no space for others. They dominate and hoard conversation time by focusing primarily on what they want to talk about (holding court), while paying little or no interest to other people's thoughts, feelings, and priorities.
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Why do you have to go no contact with a narcissist?

If we ignore them again by saying “no” or going “no contact” with them, narcissists might go into a complete rage. This rage is a coping mechanism in order for them to deal with us keeping our distance from them or saying “no” to them. A rejection of narcissists means that we think they are not perfect.
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How do you get narcissistic supply?

To be admired and to get their supply, narcissists employ various strategies, including impression management. They ingratiate themselves using their charm, emotional intelligence, bragging, seduction, and manipulation. Receiving attention and admiration boosts their weak self and lack of self-esteem.
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Do narcissists turn on their enablers?

Typically a narcissist manipulates an enabler through alternating abuse and special treatment. The enabler falls into a pattern of avoiding attack while also seeking rewards such as affection, praise, sex, or money.
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Why are narcissists targeted?

"They get targeted if they are in good shape, they exercise a lot, and take care of their appearance. I've also seen people specifically targeted if they are of a religious faith, then the person either tries to get them to do things that go against their faith principles, or somehow break [them] down."
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What is hoovering by a narcissist?

Coined after the Hoover vacuum, hoovering is a calculating scheme commonly used by narcissists to "suck" you up into their orbit and get you back into their life. It's an energetically draining dynamic that perpetuates a toxic pattern of idealization, devaluation, and discardment.
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Why do narcissists spread rumors?

They have to be right about everything and their “truth” must be adopted by others. In addition, because of their inability to empathize with others and the fact they don't feel responsible of their actions, they can easily tell lies that may seem extremely unreal to you and twist the truth.
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