Am I the narcissist or the codependent?

Narcissistic people often need someone else to inflate their self-esteem. They may need a continuous stream of affection and admiration to feel good about themselves. Some self-help websites refer to this stream as a “narcissistic supply.” Meanwhile, people with codependency are often hyper-focused on others.
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How do you tell the difference between a codependent and a narcissist?

Codependency is a disorder of a “lost self.” Codependents have lost their connection to their innate self. Instead, their thinking and behavior revolve around a person, substance, or process. Narcissists also suffer from a lack of connection to their true self. In its place, they're identified with their ideal self.
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Can you be a codependent narcissist?

One study showed a significant correlation between narcissism and codependency. Although most narcissists can be classified as codependent, but the reverse isn't true — most codependents aren't narcissists. They don't exhibit common traits of exploitation, entitlement, and lack of empathy.
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What are the signs of a codependent person?

Signs of codependency include:
  • Difficulty making decisions in a relationship.
  • Difficulty identifying your feelings.
  • Difficulty communicating in a relationship.
  • Valuing the approval of others more than valuing yourself.
  • Lacking trust in yourself and having poor self-esteem.
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How can a narcissist not be codependent?

  1. 5 Step Guide. ...
  2. 5 Steps to stop being codependent with a narcissist. ...
  3. Stop focusing on how to help the narcissist. ...
  4. Focus on yourself. ...
  5. Practice being assertive. ...
  6. Set solid boundaries. ...
  7. Practice self-love and self-care.
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ARE YOU A CODEPENDENT or a NARCISSIST ? HERE'S the DIFFERENCE



What does a narcissistic codependent relationship look like?

People with codependency sometimes form relationships with people who have NPD. Typically the two partners develop complementary roles to fill each other's needs. The codependent person has found a partner they can pour their self into, and the narcissistic person has found someone who puts their needs first.
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Am I the narcissist or are they?

People with NPD have an inflated sense of self-importance and are prone to exaggerating achievements and expecting to be recognized as superior. “Narcissists love to constantly talk about their own accomplishments and achievements with grandiose,” says psychotherapist Jacklyn Krol, LCSW, of Mind Rejuvenation Therapy.
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What happens when a codependent leaves a narcissist?

When narcissists leave a codependent, they often make them feel like they will never come back. They do this to put you on edge so you will be lost and overwhelmed by fear that you have been abandoned. Being in a state of fear and anxiety makes it harder to think clearly about what's happening.
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What does codependent behavior look like?

But, a person who is codependent will usually: Find no satisfaction or happiness in life outside of doing things for the other person. Stay in the relationship even if they are aware that their partner does hurtful things. Do anything to please and satisfy their enabler no matter what the expense to themselves.
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Do I love him or am I codependent?

Key Differences Between Love and Codependency

With love addiction, the relationship is rooted in feelings of insecurity and low self-esteem. The result is that a codependent person loses a sense of themselves and focuses completely on the needs of their partner.
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Are codependents manipulative?

Codependents have trouble being direct and assertive and may use manipulation to get their way. They may say whatever they think someone wants to hear to get along or be loved, but then later they do what they want. This is also passive-aggressive behavior.
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What kind of woman does a narcissist marry?

A narcissistic man is attracted to someone who looks beautiful and accomplished—not because they like that person, but because her appearance and accomplishments fuel his ego. However, a narcissist also wants a woman who isn't too confident because he wants to run the show.
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What is the root of codependency?

Codependency is usually rooted in childhood. Often, a child grows up in a home where their emotions are ignored or punished. This emotional neglect can give the child low self-esteem and shame. They may believe their needs are not worth attending to.
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Who do codependents attract?

Codependents seek out partners whom they can save and get drowned in taking care of their partners while never being taken care of themselves. Like a pair of dysfunctional puzzle pieces perfectly fitting together floating across a sea of misery, codependents attract those who desire caregivers and enablers (vampires).
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Can a narcissist be faithful?

Loyal. Narcissists require loyalty. That being said, the loyalty is only one way. Many narcissists demand loyalty from their partners, while hypocritically betraying the relationship themselves; sometimes by even cheating on their partners, with no remorse.
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How do you break codependency habits?

Some healthy steps to healing your relationship from codependency include:
  1. Start being honest with yourself and your partner. ...
  2. Stop negative thinking. ...
  3. Don't take things personally. ...
  4. Take breaks. ...
  5. Consider counseling. ...
  6. Rely on peer support. ...
  7. Establish boundaries.
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Do codependents have a victim mentality?

Moreover, victim mentality can result from individuals being in codependent relationships: either with their partners, or while growing up in codependent relationships with their caregivers.
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What is high functioning codependent?

High functioning codependency is a behavior characterized by blurred boundaries and an imbalance in relationships. In highly functioning codependent relationships, one person takes responsibility for fulfilling another person's needs, trying to control all aspects of their relationship.
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Are codependents angry?

Codependency Causes Anger and Resentment

But when other people don't do what we want, we feel angry, victimized, unappreciated or uncared for, and powerless – unable to be agents of change for ourselves. Dependency also leads to fear of a confrontation.
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Why do codependents love narcissists?

Initially, a narcissistic personality can be attractive for their charisma and confidence, among other personal traits. A codependent person can come off at first as kind and selfless on top of other individual attractive traits. This pair may connect for a variety of reasons, including the mutual need to feel needed.
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What is the root cause of narcissism?

Although the cause of narcissistic personality disorder isn't known, some researchers think that in biologically vulnerable children, parenting styles that are overprotective or neglectful may have an impact. Genetics and neurobiology also may play a role in development of narcissistic personality disorder.
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Will a codependent ever leave a narcissist?

The narcissist will happily keep the relationship going as long as the codependent can meet their need for constant admiration, which is exactly how the codependent acts to chase the high. Therefore the narcissist will only break the cycle if the codependent stops being codependent.
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What are the red flags of a narcissist?

Self-importance

Having manipulative tendencies. Engaging in a whirlwind romance. Lacking compassion or a severe lack of empathy for others. Love bombing.
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What are female narcissists like?

While male narcissists might be more outwardly recognizable, female narcissists do exist. They tend to be more manipulative socially and can be just as vindictive as a male narcissist. They tend to play the victim, be overly jealous and competitive, superficial, and overbearing.
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Can a person have narcissistic traits and not be a narcissist?

Not every narcissist has Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD), as narcissism is a spectrum. People who are at the highest end of the spectrum are those that are classified as NPD, but others, still with narcissistic traits, may fall on the lower end of the narcissistic spectrum.
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